Tuesday, September 30, 2008

helloesx, i'm here again.


anyway, these past 2 fays were horrible. i totally lost my aim for studying because i just couldn't figure out what am i studying so hard for and why must i study my guts out because i don't think i'm studying for God but am studying for myself, for my folks. and it's freaky to know how tired you are after that because all this while your eyes were fixed on the wrong place.

it's true. trouble indeed came. and sometimes i just don't know what to do and it seems as though God's so far far away. what i did still haunts me at times. mistakes, errors, wrong this, wrong that. argh!!!!! it's just so bad!!!

and then, i was doing my qt and thanking God for her when she called me. and she till felt the same!!!!! she too, also wondered what is she studying so hard for!!!! man, we are tired people. tired of studying, tired of studying for the wrong motives. and i was just crying over the phone telling her over the phone to just "give your best" because there're times when i don't and even if i did, it's with wrong intent and these few days seem so oppressive. i felt as though God's far and God doesn't love me anymore.

hahahaha!!!!! :DD

1 comment:

redstrawberrie said...

hello! please look at my 6 oct post on my blog. i actually typed ALL THAT as my reply here. but i realised it became so loong, i might as well post it up.